Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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