All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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