So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
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