so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
