wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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