the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
