they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
