I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
