you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
She needs sedatives and a leash
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
