so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize