so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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