Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
