If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize