margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
