I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
