I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
