Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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