i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
