Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
