I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Dick very happy bro
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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