Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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