great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
3pm strippers are depressing
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Dear god my vagina.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
