I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
