I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
