We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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