nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
