Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
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