did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
It's rum buckets o'clock
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
