So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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