ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
No subtext here. People are naked.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
