She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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