I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
