I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
