She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
