my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
