what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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