I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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