I just cut my nipple shaving
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
