I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize