There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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