I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
