Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
