I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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