I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I pour the whiskey from now on
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
