Someone shit on the floor
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
