i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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