he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
