lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
