Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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