Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
