I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I FOUND THE LEGS
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Randomize
